Diseases I Was Convinced I Had At One Point Or Another

I am a hypochondriac. Yeah, you heard me. Not just any old chondriac
but a hypochondriac. Over the years I have been convinced I have had
all of the following ailments only to be talked down by either a
girlfriend, loved one or family member:

-The Gout
-Rib Cancer
-Throat Cancer
-Scurvy (I ate a lot of oranges that week)
-Whatever disease you get when that creepy spider lays eggs in your skin
-Diabetes
-Testicular Cancer
-Skin Cancer
-Hepatitis (although I'm not sure why exactly)
-Herpes (totes false alarm)